"Jesus Of Nazareth" - An Unfinished Book Review

I love being reminded of why I am Catholic. I sometimes go through phases of disillusionment with the Church. The abuse scandals, stories of errant priests and even church politics...it can all make me put on my sulky, judgemental hat and silently wish I were a Quaker (no hierarchy, no disputes over doctrine, in fact, not much talking at all!)

Ah, but then He steps in and sends me a little reminder of all that is best about Catholicism.

Last week, that reminder came to me in my local library. I had only gone there to return some books and I had little time to spare with a fussy, teething baby strapped to me. But just by chance, I caught sight of the book "Jesus of Nazareth". I grabbed the only copy, rushed through the check out and hurried home. I am very glad I did.

This is the first book written by our Pope Benedict and it is gloriously simple in it's aim. It is his "personal search for the face of the Lord".

I wish I were smart enough to do justice to this book and describe how profound it is. But I can't. It is at times bewilderingly complex and I find myself re-reading passages and sentences many times over trying to get to the root of what the author is saying.

In basic form, it is a review of the Jesus of the Gospels and it outlines the key stories and ideas about Him, starting first with His baptism. It is, in part, an attempt to rescue Christ from the many modern interpretations of the New Testament which portray Him as something which He is simply not (whether that be just a wise teacher, a revolutionary military leader, a lover to Mary Magdalene or even more startling, a lover to St. John).

Reading it, I'm astonished by how much I don't know about Him and the world in which He was first revealed. Particularly striking for me was a simple 2 page discussion of the role of Barabbas. I had always thought of Barabbas as a crazed figure, a murderous mad-man whose public image Pilate was depending on to keep him from having to pass judgement on Christ. Our author reveals that actually, Barabbas was more likely a revolutionary leader, a sort of "messianic figure" who had led a recent uprising in the area. I learnt that his name, Bar-abbas, means "son of the father"...and that the choice Plate offers the people between these two messianic figures is no accident. My jaw dropped...and this was just a taster.

Passages and stories from New Testament are dissected and analysed in such intricate detail. Seemingly innocuous sentences and phrases are given new depth and meaning. And more times than I can count, the writings in the NT are linked to Old Testament prophecies and passages, demonstrating just how rich and layered the Judaeo-Christian faith is.

I can't wait to finish this book and though it will probably take me some time (I was using my dictionary before I had finished the first chapter!) it is going to be infinitely worth it.


'The testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple'.
Psalm 19:7

Pretty In Pink

I blogged a few weeks ago about my very talented sister and her propensity for making beautiful things from yarn.

Well, we were lucky enough to have her visit us last weekend and lo! She came bearing yet more beautiful gifts for Baby Martha. These gorgeous socks and booties are a perfect fit...and such a sweet colour.

In fact, they are so lovely I'm almost tempted to squeeze my feet into them!


'She looks for wool and flax
And works with her hands in delight'.
Proverbs 31:13

Swimming Against The Tide

It's a tough job being a woman in this day and age. Even more so being a young woman. Mine is the generation that has never known a world without feminism and 'women's rights' and in many ways we have reaped much benefit from the changes that have occured in the past 30 years or so. We can climb the career ladder and own property (when Margaret Thatcher first became Prime Minister she, like every woman in the UK, was legally unable to buy a house for herself; needing the signature of a male guarantor. And she was the PM!). We can buy our own cars and clothes and holidays and we do not need to rely on a man to provide for us.

We are the 'Sex and the City' generation. We've grown up listening to Beyonce preaching to us about being an "Independent Woman" and we've watched Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda sleep their way through New York, decked out in designer gear whilst simultaneously holding down fabulous, glamorous high pressure jobs. Yes, truly, we can do anything that a man can and we can do it in heels.

And I don't begrudge anyone the right to live how they want but for those of us (there are many...I know there are) who decide not to buy into the system, life can be tricky.

This has become all the more obvious to me since leaving my work and 'coming home'. I wasn't a real high-flyer, but I did work in a high pressure, male dominated industry where competition was fierce. At times, it was a really depressing place to be. Women were seldom taken seriously and there was an expectation that we would work a lot harder than the men just to be noticed.
The effect this had on the women was quite profound. Few were married, fewer still had children. And the further up the ladder you climbed, the less and less likely you were to find women living in traditional families. "Man-bashing" was a common every day occurrence, the prospect of babies and children was frequently scoffed at and Lord help you if you dare to suggest that it's not such a bad thing to be dependent on a man.

So I was not at all surprised to read the results of an American health study a few months ago that rather sensationally revealed that "career women" have higher levels of infertility, more incidents of hormone in-balances and are more prone to heart attacks, stroke and similar health problems resulting from their stressful work environments.

Women have clearly suffered as a result of the massive back-lash against traditional gender roles. Wasn't the concept of female emancipation supposed to be about choice? I find it hard to believe that scores of women across the western world are shackling themselves to jobs that leave them exhausted and childless because they want to.

Maybe this is happening because women so often feel that they simply don't have a choice. The messages we hear throughout school, university, from friends and teachers are relentless. You either work full-time, or you're "just a mother". You either support the availability of abortion, or you are anti-woman. You either earn as much money as you can or you risk handing over all control to the man in your life. You either wait to have babies until you're in you're late 30's or you're wasting your youth.

This isn't choice. This is battery by social expectation.

But despite years and years of heavy propaganda, the tide of our culture cannot wash away the basic biological and psychological instincts of women. A lot of us still do want to have children, some of us really long for it. We still do wish to be married rather than just live with someone. We still enjoy pottering about at home on a sunny day, baking a cake, knitting a scarf or potting some plants. We may be aware that these things don't constitute 'meaningful' work in the eyes of society but a lot of us still do it all anyway.

I'm one of the lucky ones though.

I have felt completely liberated since leaving the work-place and my experiences made me seriously re-assess most of what I was taught by my hardcore feminist lecturers at university. And I was incredibly lucky to meet a man who really valued the role of a traditional wife and mother, a man who is not afraid to carry the financial burden of our family without support from his wife.

I would love to be able to say that I have a magic solution, an antidote to the huge pressure heaped on young women to abandon their natural instincts and hurl themselves into stressful careers which force them to behave and act like men. But there is no antidote. My daughter will no doubt experience the same pressure when she comes of age.

But what we can do is eliminate ourselves from the competition. We can remove ourselves from the rat-race and decide alone how to best spend our time and energy. I believe for some women, this does mean forging a career, even when children come along. But for great numbers of women, the traditional role of wife and mother is a valid choice, made through conscious and deliberate consideration of all the available options.

We need to reclaim our right to choose. We will have to swim against the tide and begin a new, fresh 'women's movement'. We don't need to take to the streets though, wave banners or hold meetings. We can start this movement by simply by refusing to 'justify' our choices to virtual strangers. We can start by holding ourselves answerable only to God and our conscience.

We need to reclaim our right to choose.

Trying Times

Martha is going through a difficult phase at the moment. I'm almost certain she's teething...and it's making her really grouchy!

Screaming fits in the evening, fussiness during the day, a desperate urge to have something in her mouth constantly, a reluctance to be put down...ever and frequent night-wakings. It's been a very trying few days. And it is so easy when things are like this to let the frustration overcome me and really lose my temper. So it helps me to remember....

It's all worth it. That big gummy grin she gives me every morning when we've just woken up. That high pitched squeal of a laugh she emits when I tickle her tummy. The way she looks at her Daddy when he comes home every day. She is my greatest blessing and God's greatest gift.

I love being her mother.

"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate".

Psalm 127: 3-5

A Loaf for Lent!

This is a great recipe for Lent as it is fairly plain as well as inexpensive to make. It's also a perfect alternative to the average fat-laden breakfast muffin.

It has no chocolate, no icing, no butter and no cream...I admit I'm not making it sound terribly nice. But trust me, it is!

Bran Loaf Recipe:

Serve with butter, low-fat spread or jam. Or just eat it plain.

75g Kelloggs All-Bran cereal
165g self raising flour
175g dried mixed fruit
120g light brown soft sugar
300ml milk
A few teaspoons of nutmeg and cinnamon.

1. Place the cereal, mixed fruit, sugar and milk in a large mixing bowl and leave for about 90 minutes.
2. Once the mixture has gone really soggy, pre-heat the oven to 150oC and grease a 1 lb loaf tin with plenty of butter (I find it best NOT to line the tin with greaseproof paper as it can stick very hard to the loaf.)
3. Next, sieve the flour into the mixture and mix thoroughly.
4. Add the nutmeg & cinnamon and mix.
5. Spoon the mixture into the tin and bake in the oven for about 90 minutes.

And you're done!

The Lenten Bookshelf

Life can get horribly complicated at times and I for one, find it all too easy to get completely wrapped up in the most insignificant of events.

But the season of Lent is the perfect antidote to this kind of 'internal noisiness'. Lent is the time to take a mental step back from the world, look deep into oneself and reflect.

And I find it helps enormously to have some sound religious and spiritual reading material on hand to assist me in this.

These are the items currently sitting on my 'Lenten bookshelf':



1. The Bible - A perpetual source of knowledge, wisdom, inspiration and comfort. Essential reading at all times of the year, but especially leading up to Easter.

2. "St. Therese of Lisieux" by Kathryn Harrison - This is a re-read. Well, actually, it's more like a re-re-re-re-re-read! But I absolutely adore this book. I don't know why or even how I came to read it in the first place but the story and the life of St. Therese has fascinated me ever since. I have come to think of her almost as my own patron saint. She embodied everything that is best about the faith. She had one goal in mind, to love Christ. And she succeeded in committing every action, every word and almost every thought to Him. And yet she was precocious, unusual, even childish and silly at times. She stands for me as the ultimate example that we do not need to be perfect to love God. By His grace all of us are capable of being saints.
This book doesn't shy away from the difficult aspects of her life and her struggle through what is called the "Dark Night of The Soul" is depicted very sharply. Kathryn Harris succeeds in making her subject seem above all, human. A beautiful book.

3. "Created To Be His Help Meet" by Debi Pearl - This is a book aimed at Christian women who are, or are preparing to be, wives and mothers and whilst it's focus is distinctly not Catholic, there seems to be some really useful challenging stuff in it. It looks to be a very interesting read!

4. The Catechism of The Catholic Church - Found on the Vatican website (www.vatican.va). This I have undertaken to read this Lent to get a better understanding of the faith from a practical view. A sort of ABC of Catholicism!

I hope, after these 6 weeks, to be better grounded in the faith and to have a fresh, motivated outlook on life.

To all those observing the season, may you have a peaceful and productive Lent!

My Funny Valentine

Yesterday was Valentine's Day. Typically it's a day for big romantic gestures, spending a little too much money and eating out at fancy restaurants. But we keep things pretty low key in our family. We don't buy extravagant gifts or make wild, grand gestures. We are far more content just to be home together, enjoying each other's company.

So instead, we ate a lovely home-cooked meal, took a walk together and exchanged some little gifts.

And in the afternoon, Hubby set about doing a few little D.I.Y jobs he has been wanting to do.

So this post is dedicated to him.

I love you my sunny, funny Valentine!