Much is made about housewives and money. I can't count the number of times I have heard the phrase: "I would love to stay at home, but we just can't afford it". It's widely assumed that in order to stay at home and be a homemaker, your husband must either be really rich or you have to live like paupers, surviving on bread and water alone.
Of course, neither scenario is true. It would be false to suggest that I don't sometimes struggle with the lose of my personal income. Having to budget very tightly is new to me, having become used to having the cash to go out for dinner if I wanted, or buying a stash of my favourite bath products to keep for rainy nights in.
But these are of course luxuries, albeit relatively modest ones. And since coming home, I have had to give up the freedom to have and do these things as I please. But it is quite possible for almost any couple* to maintain a lifestyle that neither deprives them of the necessary, nor forces both parties into the work-force.
And once you start making room for the role of homemaker, it's amazing the contentment and pleasure that is to be found in small, every-day details. A morning cup of tea, drunk in bed while the sun streams through the window. The smell of freshly baked biscuits and cakes which you just know you would never find the time or energy to make if you were out of the house from 9-5 every day. The freedom to stop, relax, or even take a walk when you need to, not when someone tells you to. You don't need wealth to afford these luxuries. Deciding to come home may mean sacrificing new clothes, expensive haircuts, perhaps even a car or fancy house, but for the average person*, it can be done.
But in order for this message to spread throughout society, we need to have a major shift in what is promoted and sold as "necessary". Everyone needs to be able to afford a roof over their heads and have enough money to heat it, light it and cook food in it. But holidays, multiple cars, clothes allowances, trips to the hair salon and the thousands of other items and luxuries which we are told we
need are expendable. They're just the icing on the cake. And truth be told, they don't bring real happiness or contentment to people's lives. They're designed not to. If you buy a car and are satisfied with it, there will then be no incentive to "upgrade". The same goes for houses and holidays. But flick through any magazine, or pass any billboard and we are sold the message that nirvana is to be found in the tangible, every-day objects that fill our homes and garages.
It's time for a revolution of thought. It's time to reject what keeps us bound as slaves to money and wealth.
Being a housewife is a powerful symbol of this revolution of thought. It is a message to the world that you don't value yourself only according to what someone is willing to pay you. It sends the message that consumer goods don't bring a household peace or harmony.
It's time to reclaim our intrinsic value and be unashamed of what we do and why.
So to all housewives: Embrace what you do! Be proud of this happy calling. And when 'they' question you with a sneer of their face and contempt in their voice, about "just what it is that you do all day"... tell them you're changing the world.
Afterword: I am very aware that there are many people who truly do not possess the choice to stay at home. I know, for some families, both mother and father must work just to make ends meet. And of course for a single parent of either gender, work is the only option. This post is not attacking or judging those who must work, or risk losing their home or having their children go hungry. This post is trying to shed light on the consumer mentality so prevalent in our society that prevents many from staying at home, even when they could reasonably do so. It is this that I think needs to be tackled.
My little sister is my Creative Queen Bee. She is so very talented in so many areas that I wish I were more so. Knitting, crochet, quilting, baking, cooking...she can do it all and with aplomb. To say nothing of her academic achievements, her wonderfully creative frugal lifestyle and her community work. She's a huge inspiration to me.
